The Celebrants Network Inc - BLOG

Poems play a very important part in all of the ceremonies we celebrants perform.

A poem that has been carefully selected, can add a depth to your ceremony. A great poem can add a touch of humour, a gentle romantic touch, a spiritual tone or a sense of solemn respect, and so much more.

 It can express a parent’s love for their child at a baby naming, a couple’s love and commitment in a wedding ceremony or renewal of vows, and showcase a life in a funeral ceremony.

The big question is, how do you selection poems.



One really workable suggestion is to build up a collection of poems to offer your clients, and to add to the collection all of the time to keep your selections fresh and appealing.

I keep mine in different folders to make it easier to pick the best poem for the ceremony: modern love poems, classic love poems, naming poems, funeral poems, etc., and make sure that you follow the copyright laws, and always, always, always acknowledge the poet.


Fortunately, there are lots of tools online to help.

Here are just three wedding poem lists after a quick Google search:

• The Poetry Foundation offers a small list that covers classical and offbeat poems.
  
  www.poetryfoundation.org
  
  
• Hitched has highlighted a number of wonderful poems to select from.
  
  www.hitched.com.au
  
  
• A Practical Wedding lists these “non-cheesy” poems. 
  
  apracticalwedding.com

And three funeral poetry guides :

• FamilyFriendPoems , a website dedicated to Poetry, has a great section on Funeral poetry.
  
  www.familyfriendpoems.com
  
  
• FuneralHelper has a collection of Non Religious Poetry.
  
  www.funeralhelper.org
  
  
• LastingPost has a vast number of poems and readings.
  
  www.lastingpost.com

Naming day poems are always very personal to the parents, and often the parents have researched and selected the poem for themselves.

• PoemSource is a great place to start.
  
  www.poemsource.com

On the Forum Board on our TCN website, there is a New Forum Topic for you as TCN members to put links to your favourite poems.

So, can you hop online, find your favourite poem and add the link to this Forum, and we will end up with a great resource section of poetry for all occasions.

*  The creation of our brand new and improved website - more user friendly and easier to navigate, while still housing all the resources, articles, directories and forums that you could ever need.

* Our wonderful two day conference at the Novotel in Darling Harbour Sydney where our members met with old and new friends, heard some fabulous inspiring speakers and completed their annual professional development obligations.  

TCN is a national organisation that primarily communicates online, so it is possible for everyone to join in and participate in discussions and projects no matter where you are in Australia.  We are also continuing to build up a strong presence on social media with pages on Facebook, Twitter, Linkedin and Instagram

Our TCN Committee is a group of volunteers committed to supporting our members as well as strengthening the professionalism and expertise of all civil celebrants through our active involvement in the peak body, CoCA.

TCN members elect a new committee each year at the AGM in March, and we are very happy to welcome our new Committee for 2016-2017.

We very much look forward to a year of community, harmony, OPD days and special projects throughout the year. 

All celebrants and non-celebrant Affiliates are welcome to join TCN - Visit our webpage and see the fabulous resources and benefits we offer our Members.

Rona Goold
Coordinator Celebrants & Celebrations Network Australia
Civil Marriage and Family Celebrant

Last year our family had a tragic loss when one of my husband's nephews died while snorkeling. He was 26.

His life just opening up to all the wonder of life's creation and opportunities. "Life cut short too soon, wise, soft . . ."#

It was a bitter, bittersweet time to review his life. Seeing Sam as baby, a toddler, child, teenager and young man brought back the memories hidden in the mind and heart.

His ceremony strengthened resolve to treasure all our loved ones, with awareness that life is short. To honour all those who give a part of who they are, to become a part of who we are. To be present to pain and loss. To support those who grieve beyond ending. To be present to the love within us and around us. And yet to face a new dawn with courage and hope for one more day of life's journey, knowing our turn comes inevitably to join the mystery of death.

Civil ceremonies tap deep into the human need to honour life, to share our stories, our pain, our truth and  hope. They may or may not acknowledge the specific religious beliefs of some present, but they all aim to treasure life.

Easter time can be for everyone a time to mourn and treasure the past, reflect upon presence and the present, and renew hope for the next moment.

May this Easter bring peace of mind and heart to all - with a touch of delight in the shape of an egg!

# Words texta-d on Sam's coffin.

Easter Celebrations

As with many other Christian dates, the celebration of Easter extends beyond the church and since its origins, it has been a time of celebration and feasting.

Easter Sunday morning is often filled with children (of all ages) searching for chocolate eggs and treats which have been mysteriously hidden all over the house and garden. According to the children's stories, the eggs were delivered by the Easter Bunny in an Easter basket which children find waiting for them when they wake up. (The Easter Bunny's motives for doing this have still not been clarified.)

 

These secular rituals often have origins in Christian symbolism; the eggs, for example, can be taken as signs of rebirth and resurrection. 

Some of Easter's symbols can be traced back still further; some (such as the Easter bunny, originally a hare) seem to have their origins in earlier pagan rituals celebrating nature's springtime rebirth.  In Australia it is not spring time, however we have adopted the tradition in keeping with our northern hemisphere cousins.




Whether you belong to a religion or not, there are plenty of ways to celebrate Easter...

Shrove Tuesday or Pancake Day

Shrove Tuesday is the last day before Lent. In earlier days there were many foods that observant Christians would not eat during Lent such as meat and fish, eggs, and milky foods. So that no food was wasted, families would have a feast on the shriving Tuesday, and eat up all the foods that wouldn't last the forty days of Lent without going off.

Pancakes became associated with Shrove Tuesday because they were a dish that could use up perishable foodstuffs such as eggs, fats and milk, with just the addition of flour.

Many Australian groups and communities make and share pancakes on Shrove Tuesday. 

Selling pancakes to raise money for charity is also a popular activity - and that's what I call Partying with a purpose!

Family Reunion

Perhaps you and your family could use the public/bank holidays to reconnect with each other and to make it a more meaningful event, you could add a ceremony to your reunion celebrating all the fabulous events that have happened in all your family member's lives since the last time that you saw each other - you could invite your Family Celebrant to create a ceremony for your family gathering and make it an annual event!

What other Easter traditions are special to your family?

Releasing the doves
The happy bride and groom release a pair of white doves — one male, the other female — into the air, which represent a harmonious life together for the newly married couple.



China:

Wardrobe Changes
In China, brides typically walk down the aisle in a slim-fitting, embroidered dress ... what is called a traditional qipao or cheongsam. For the reception, they change into a more poofy, decked out gown with Western flare. But the bridal fashion show doesn't end there! To cap the night, Chinese brides often make a final change into a cocktail dress. Total: three dresses!

This is what is so wonderful about living in such a multicultural society; each culture bringing with them their rich traditions and colourful customs. 

Together we stand in harmony

#harmondyday

Why not speak to one our many fabulous TCN Celebrants to see how you can incorproate cultural customs into your own wedding celebrations?

Every year on the 8th March women all over the world are celebrated.

So there is still much more work to be done!

 We, at TCN are all about the celebrations in life; and we are all for equality and human rights for everybody.

Celebrating Women

Here are some ways you can celebrate the women you know this month (and every month - why stop there?)

Note:  These tips are not just for men - women should be celebrating other women as well.

1. Tell your mother how precious she is to you and let her know you are thankful for everything she has done in her life

2. Show your sister that she is a very important person in your life

3. Encourage your daughter to be anything that she wants to be and let her know that her gender should never be a barrier

4. Visit your Grand Mother and use the annual Mothers Day to engage a celebrant for a special ceremony for all the mothers in your family

These are all very simple and easy things to do, so if you want to stretch yourself further a field......

6. Volunteer at or donate to a women's refuge

7. Donate money or your time to women's charities

8. Be the voice in your company or organisation who stands up for those women not being paid or treated fairly

Why not add a ceremony to the celebration of the women in your life? 

Contact a TCN celebrant to find out how

Read more about all the ways celebrants can assist you in celebrating life

How are you going to celebrate your new baby and welcome her or him into your family and community?  For some couples the answer is easy - baby will be welcomed into their Church family, probably with the same ceremony that was used for the parents years before, and there will often be a family party to celebrate the occasion.

There is an alternative available for couples who prefer not to have a religious ceremony - a Naming or Name-giving ceremony conducted by a Civil Celebrant.  This personalised ceremony can be held in any location the parents choose - a park or garden, in a home, at a hall or restaurant - wherever suits your plans.  Baby can be welcomed in to the family or the wider friendship group in a beautiful ceremony that reflects the beliefs and wishes of the parents.  If you want to you can include some religious content such as a prayer or blessing.  Older siblings can participate in various ways, the parents might choose friends or family members to be mentors/guardians/guide parents/godparents to the baby. Music and poetry or stories will probably be included. 

There are more ideas here

Celebrants from the The Celebrants Network can help you by creating and delivering a beautiful and memorable ceremony to welcome your baby into the world.

ASK A CELEBRANT BLOG: We can pool our money and other resources to buy something really special such as making the celebration THE gift.

We could pool our $$$$ to engage a professional independent celebrant, rather than everyone buying their own individual gift.

Like well designed stage play, a special event may cost from $ 600 to $ 2000 or more. This may seem a lot, but is it really if the price is spread across a lot of people and the event has longer lasting benefits.

A $ 600 ceremony package can be covered by

• 20 participants donating $ 30 per head OR
• 50 participants at $ 12 OR
• 100 participants at $6 per head

A $ 2000 ceremony package can be covered by

• 20 participants donating $ 100 per head OR
• 50 participants at $ 40 OR
• 100 participants at $ 20 per head

READ MORE:

What to do with those books gathering dust on your bookshelf?

Here is a fabulous, low-cost, easy and fun craft activity, which you can make yourself to decorate your ceremonial space.  

A unique decorative idea for a wedding ceremony or any special occasion.  

These lanterns are made entirely from old books and were made by my daughters at our local library school holiday lantern making workshop this week.

Why not gather your bridal party together and make many?

All you need is a book and some ribbon!!  The older and more ragged the book with yellowing pages the better as the final product gives a fabulous vintage look to your lantern.   Feel free to email me for the instructions at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

Posted by Robbie Fincham Civil Celebrant, Melbourne

The changes to society in the last 200 years in western culture have brought many benefits, but also many negatives

• people are separated from family support and roots by employment needs and thus young and old alike are more isolated. Thus at higher risk of depression.
• the wedding is too late for relationship education. Becoming an adult, leaving home, getting engaged are better times to promote those services

Have you ever thought of giving a loved one a ceremony as a gift?  Perhaps this sounds a bit strange but think about it a bit more.  How many people recognise this scenario:

Your sister from interstate rings - "It's Mum's 80th birthday in 3 months time - what are we going to do about it?"  You talk a little more and decide that it would be a good time to get the family together and have a bit of a party to celebrate.  So the message goes out - the family are all primed to be at Mum's favourite restaurant where you have booked a private room for lunch on the big day.  A few of Mum's close friends are let in on the secret and invited and the plan is underway.

The next phone call is almost inevitable - "what shall we get Nan for a present? - it should be something special for her 80th"  So you talk to a friend who happens to be a Celebrant.  And this is what you come up with:

Let the celebration be the gift

Suggest to all attending that the very best gift for Mum will be the company and love of her family and friends. Agree that each will make a contribution to that gift by being a participant in the day.  Engage a Civil Celebrant to coordinate the arrangements and conduct a short ceremony before the lunch.  Decide to share the cost of the meal and Celebrant in whatever way is fair for your family and circumstances.  

Your Celebrant will put a lot of work into the day as Coordinator and Presenter.  She will work with you to design your ideal ceremony.  Her suggestions might include - Let the children and grandchildren nominate a role they will take on the day - to sing, play, read a poem, make a DVD from Mum's photos, compile a CD of songs from different eras of your Mum's life, present flowers, make a speech, bake a cake, escort Nan to the venue and so on.  Your celebrant will weave these contributions into a ceremony.  She may invite everyone who is attending to write a letter or card that shares some special memory they have of your Mum and compile these into a gift book.  She will probably record the highlights of Mum's life There are many possibilities and you will be able to discuss these and decide what suits your needs.

By the time the big day arrives you and your family will have created a unique gift for a special person.

To find a The Celebrants Network Celebrant to help you plan or to get more information and ideas for a special celebration have a look at our website

A good celebrant is much more than a good performer. They need to be  .. . . .

READ MORE

ASK A CELEBRANT BLOG:

Most professional civil celebrants are professionals in private practice.

That is, unlike most religious celebrants, the civil celebrant has to cover all their costs of operating a home-based celebrancy practice from the fees they charge 'up-front' for their ceremonies, BEFORE they make an hourly rate for their work.

Consider:

• Couples have not 'lay-buyed'  part of their ceremony as couples have via donations to a church or via government taxes to a Registry Office.
• A religious celebrant is usually supported financially by their church stipend and has their travel, phone and other expenses covered by their religious institution. Likewise registry office celebrant.
• A independent civil celebrant is required to ensure the ceremony suits the individual couple.
• In most cases, this requires considerable extra work in sourcing wedding prose, poetry and other materials, or even writing of new material by the celebrant.
• READ MORE

ASK A CELEBRANT BLOG:  We all love to see expressions of delight when we make a love gesture a surprise!  But what if this backfires?

People need to be psychologically prepared to be the focus of attention, even if it is for a short while, by knowing they are going to a party or an event. Elderly people may have even more difficulty being fully present to the occasion if they are not prepared.

So the TCNA does not recommend “total” surprises for anyone. And of course, under no circumstances can the bride or groom be surprised about their own wedding . . .

READ MORE

ASK A CELEBRANT BLOG: Problem is by the time I've reached this age, I'll probably need someone else to organise this for me!

So how can a congratulatory message be organised? Australians who are celebrating a special birthday or wedding anniversary can receive personal congratulations from the Prime Minister, Governor-General or The Queen.

Who is eligible for a congratulatory message?

• The Prime Minister will send a message of congratulations to people turning 90 years of age or more.
• The Queen and Governor-General will send a message on a 100th birthday.

Read more

Civil ceremonies and celebrations for significant life events - for individuals, couples, families or communities - are designed and delivered to provide an inclusive environment in which to

• honour all people - respecting the diversity of their individual talents and skills; gender; sexual preference, race; family, educational, religious, social, cultural backgrounds; life experiences; beliefs; personal, emotional, spiritual, social and other needs

READ MORE

ASK A CELEBRANT  BLOG There are many things to consider in choosing a celebrant

Like a jigsaw puzzle, there are many things to consider before you have the full picture. Some people go on first impressions or “gut feelings”. Others choose on price – the least or most expensive. Yet others look for value for money.

Each of these on its own is rather limited when you consider the celebration can never be repeated!

But each has something valuable to consider, when trying to make the best decision for your situation.

Consider the celebrant’s ……..

By Roslyn Macfarlane,
Access Civil Ceremonies
 http://www.accesscc.com.au

Having just passed our 42^nd anniversary I have been giving some thought to having a ceremony to celebrate all of our years together.  Like most couples our journey through life has had some twists and turns,

some ups and downs and still, together we have created some wonderful memories.

Raising a family and having a successful, long term, loving marriage is an event worth celebrating and waiting for the major milestones to celebrate that makes sense in some ways, but when I think about it, there is no really good reason to wait.  Every year we have together as a couple and as a family is a blessing.  Fate can take us down any number of roads, and all too often we find ourselves wishing that we had acted on our good ideas sooner, rather than later.

So where do you begin to prepare for such a celebration?  Looking at the history so far; where it began, the roads you have travelled and the things that inspired you along the way can be a good place to start.  Bringing in elements of your life that have had significant impact such as holidays, professional achievements, social involvements and family.  If you  think a ceremony to celebrate your anniversary is a good idea then there are some wonderful ideas on the internet. 

Visit: Wedding anniversary ceremonies

ASK A CELEBRANT BLOG: How often do we think "things" when considering a present for our parents, children or other family members and friends? Why not think about experiences that can never be repeated, that can bring pleasure to everyone, and to which everyone can donare the money to make it happen?

For the 55 and over age group "things" become less important, more things to dust and more things to say goodbye to when the time comes to downsize into a smaller place.

So why not make the celebration itself the gift?

READ MORE

ASK CELEBRANT BLOG:

Add a ceremony to your celebration!

Intuitively we know that a celebration is a way we mark important rites of passage.

Many Australians celebrate important events though, by having a booze-up and throwing in a few words towards the end.  We have forgotten that the food and drink were meant to accompany the speeches or ceremony, not be the celebration itself.

Without a meaningful core to the gathering, a celebration may be boring and unsatisfying and more likely to lead to excessive eating and drinking.

Ceremony is an Act of Love - quality time spent together, a way of re-establishing that meaningful core to the event.

READ MORE

ASK A CELEBRANT BLOG. Merry Christmas! Poem by TCN Melbourne Funeral Celebrant and Poet Graeme Cook.

This is the little verse I put inside a Christmas Card for all the families I have dealt with through each year. It's called  Merry Christmas! I’ll Be Home For Christmas.

Graeme Cook 2007

How do you and your partner celebrate your anniversaries? And what is it that you celebrate - the anniversary of first meeting, first moving in together or more traditionally, your wedding anniversary?

First thing of course is to remember the date!  This can be tricky as many of us know but it is usually greatly appreciated so well worth doing! 

Perhaps you are looking for a different and special way to celebrate this year.  Maybe it is a significant anniversary for you for some reason. It may be the number - 1st, 5th, 10th, 25th, 30th, 40th and 50th wedding anniversaries are often deemed more special,  But it may also be something else that is special this year - overcoming difficulties together, starting your family, having the last child leave home - the reasons are as individual as the couples who are celebrating.

Why not think about engaging a celebrant from the The Celebrants Network (TCN) to design and conduct a ceremony that meets your individual needs?  You can find a celebrant near you on our website .  You can also find lots of information about different ceremonies for anniversaries.  

Our TCN founder Rona Goold and her husband Steve had their 21st Wedding Anniversary last year and they asked TCN Celebrant Robyn Lenahan to conduct a ceremony for them.  

Rona made a YouTube video using pictures from their wedding to use as part of the ceremony, an example of an original idea that had significance for the guests at their celebration.  You can watch it here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ua6Qv2Yn5_o&feature=youtu.be and enjoy the original song "I Wish For You" performed by the Two Macs which was first performed at Rona and Steve's wedding.

Tell us about your ideas for celebrating anniversaries by commenting below.

Our new TCN mobile website has loads of information on celebrants, ceremonies and celebrations for everyone  

http://www.celebrations.org.au/everyone. Topics such as - Fast find an Australian celebrant; Weddings and love ceremonies; Celebrating every stage of life; Ceremonies for loss and grief; Celebrations supplier directory; Win with a gold rose celebrant; About civil celebrants; About civil ceremonies.

Subscribe to this free Ask A Celebrant - TCN Blog now on : http://www.celebrations.org.au/everyone

Published by Robbie Fincham, Civil Celebrant based in Melbourne, Vic & Chairperson of TCN Inc.
www.robbiefincham.com.au

The song "You Can't Hurry Love" by The Supremes was the finale music played at Suzi and Evan's Commitment Ceremony, I had the very great privilege of conducting in January 2013.  What a fitting song it was too, as you will understand when you read about this most remarkable love story, which has spanned more than 35 years!!

Post by Rona Goold
TCNA Coordinator
www.celebrants.org.au

Whether you received a special message today or not, isn't it great to have a day to acknowledge the value of love and friendship in our lives?

My husband and I will be married 20 years this year, so he did need the prompting of the local radio talk show to remind him that today is a special day :-)

From Rebecca Skinner

The Celebrants Network Incorporated Blog Coordinator
Celebrants & Celebrations Network Australia Celebrant Member
www.celebratinglifeschapters.com

From every wound there is a scar, and every scar tells a story. And it's not just a story about pain and suffering, it's also a story about survival, the learning process, and seeing the silver linings.

We often treat troubles as real negatives. They come into all our lives with no notice and we don't want to have to deal with them. But the reality is, troubles can often open the door to many positives.

From Rebecca Skinner

The Celebrants Network Incorporated Blog Coordinator
Celebrants & Celebrations Network Australia Celebrant Member
www.celebratinglifeschapters.com

Why do we wait until birthdays, Christmas or New Year's Eve to celebrate? I believe life is too short not to celebrate EVERY moment we can.

Without making the effort to mark a particular moment, life passes us by far too quickly and achievements and blessings can so easily get missed along the way...

From Rebecca Skinner
Celebrants & Celebrations Network Australia Celebrant Member
The Celebrants Network Incorporated Blog Coordinator
www.celebratinglifeschapters.com

Where does the word 'ceremony' come from? It's believed to be of Etruscan origin, via the Latin caerimonia meaning "awe, reverent rite" and it first entered our language in the 14th Century.
 
Ceremonies are an incredibly powerful tool. They announce and create change; they signify the importance of an event; they help us move into new stages of our lives and they connect to our past while reaching into the future. And importantly, they connect us with people who give meaning to our lives.

From Rebecca Skinner
Celebrants & Celebrations Network Australia Celebrant Member
www.celebratinglifeschapters.com

Many cultures have celebrated a young person’s ‘coming-of-age’, and it is still marked in the Jewish community as a Bar and Bat Mitzvah, when boys turn 13 and girls 12 and in Korea by the Confucian ‘Gwallye’ from ages 15 upwards. But in Western cultures this tradition is all but ignored. The Celebrants and Celebrations network thinks it is high time to reintroduce this important ceremony.

With families so geographically scattered and all of us leading such busy lives, it makes the gathering of family and friends all the more important.
 
That’s why the Celebrants and Celebrations Network encourages people to Party with a Purpose.

The association’s doesn’t believe we should have to wait until an occasion like Christmas or a wedding to get together, but that we create our own special occasions, organising  memorable and meaningful celebrations that touch hearts and enhance lives.